Because someone actually requested I write another blog, I have decided to reward you all, or y'all as I picked up from the Midwest, with probably the best story that has happened thus far.
When I first moved out to Oregon, before I had income coming in, I found myself volunteering for the lowest of the low jobs and ways to make money. I was hired to dog/house sit for a month while the owners were vacationing in South America. This is my story:
For starters, this dog has more health problems than a hypochondriac could dream of. When I arrived at the house, the dog had a cone around his neck to keep him from scratching his stitches from his most recent surgery. He has arthritis, auto-immune disease, digestive problems, and acid reflux to name a few ailments. The dog had a tendency to run off into the neighbors yard and eat directly out of the compost pile which resulted in diarrhea during the night and a $1000 carpet cleaning bill. He would also pull food off the counter if he was left alone for more than 2 minutes and eat until he was sick. This dog was a nightmare.
My first day on the job was super fun. I got home from work at 6pm and walked into a house that had been torn apart. The dog had pulled stuff off the counter including his daily medicine which had me worried at first (he obviously had not gotten into the pills, thank goodness), so I scolded him and started damage control. As I was cleaning up, I noticed there was an empty bucket lying on the floor.
"What's this?" I asked myself. "No, please don't tell me this. PLEASE."
Turns out, the owner had left the bucket of the dog's medicated arthritis chew treats out on the counter. Instead of eating the allotted amount of chew treats, 2 per day, he ate around.... 200.
Pet Poison Control charged me $60 for a phone call to tell me, "Yeah, he needs to get to the vet, ASAP." Thanks..... that was certainly worth the money. So, I loaded the dog into the back seat of my car and as I rounded the front and reached for the driver's side handle, the dog projectile vomited all over the inside of my car. We're talking vomit in the CD player, vomit in the gear shift, vomit in the parking brake, vomit EVERYWHERE. When I opened my door there was a puddle of dog vomit on my seat that had a waterfall cascading to the floor. It was spectacular. One of those miraculous wonders of the world people long to see their entire lives, and it was right in my car. How lucky am I?
Needless to say I was not going to drive while sitting in a puddle of vomit, so after I recovered from my momentary defeat, I got the dog out of the car and cleaned up as best I could. To be honest, I still gag when I think of the smell and picture the sight. It was phenomenal. I finally got the car cleaned out enough so I could sit on towels and a garbage sack. I then proceeded to drive the dog to the emergency vet during rush hour traffic with the windows rolled down for air.
Transcript of car ride:
Dog: "Whine, whine, whimper."
Me: "@#$%^#%&&^!!!!!! Please, please don't let him puke in my car. Please, just make it to the vet. Please, please, please, please, please, PLEEEEEEEEEASE."
Dog: Whine, whine, whimper."
Me: "!$%*%^&#*$%&^#$%@%$^#$&*!!!!! PLEEEEEEEASE."
(Repeat 7 times)
I barely made it to the vet before the vomit started again, along with the next thing in this adventure, diarrhea!
For those of you worried about the dog, he survived and was back to eating compost within a week.
For those of you worried about me, I'm now officially a cat person.
When I first moved out to Oregon, before I had income coming in, I found myself volunteering for the lowest of the low jobs and ways to make money. I was hired to dog/house sit for a month while the owners were vacationing in South America. This is my story:
For starters, this dog has more health problems than a hypochondriac could dream of. When I arrived at the house, the dog had a cone around his neck to keep him from scratching his stitches from his most recent surgery. He has arthritis, auto-immune disease, digestive problems, and acid reflux to name a few ailments. The dog had a tendency to run off into the neighbors yard and eat directly out of the compost pile which resulted in diarrhea during the night and a $1000 carpet cleaning bill. He would also pull food off the counter if he was left alone for more than 2 minutes and eat until he was sick. This dog was a nightmare.
My first day on the job was super fun. I got home from work at 6pm and walked into a house that had been torn apart. The dog had pulled stuff off the counter including his daily medicine which had me worried at first (he obviously had not gotten into the pills, thank goodness), so I scolded him and started damage control. As I was cleaning up, I noticed there was an empty bucket lying on the floor.
"What's this?" I asked myself. "No, please don't tell me this. PLEASE."
Turns out, the owner had left the bucket of the dog's medicated arthritis chew treats out on the counter. Instead of eating the allotted amount of chew treats, 2 per day, he ate around.... 200.
Pet Poison Control charged me $60 for a phone call to tell me, "Yeah, he needs to get to the vet, ASAP." Thanks..... that was certainly worth the money. So, I loaded the dog into the back seat of my car and as I rounded the front and reached for the driver's side handle, the dog projectile vomited all over the inside of my car. We're talking vomit in the CD player, vomit in the gear shift, vomit in the parking brake, vomit EVERYWHERE. When I opened my door there was a puddle of dog vomit on my seat that had a waterfall cascading to the floor. It was spectacular. One of those miraculous wonders of the world people long to see their entire lives, and it was right in my car. How lucky am I?
Needless to say I was not going to drive while sitting in a puddle of vomit, so after I recovered from my momentary defeat, I got the dog out of the car and cleaned up as best I could. To be honest, I still gag when I think of the smell and picture the sight. It was phenomenal. I finally got the car cleaned out enough so I could sit on towels and a garbage sack. I then proceeded to drive the dog to the emergency vet during rush hour traffic with the windows rolled down for air.
Transcript of car ride:
Dog: "Whine, whine, whimper."
Me: "@#$%^#%&&^!!!!!! Please, please don't let him puke in my car. Please, just make it to the vet. Please, please, please, please, please, PLEEEEEEEEEASE."
Dog: Whine, whine, whimper."
Me: "!$%*%^&#*$%&^#$%@%$^#$&*!!!!! PLEEEEEEEASE."
(Repeat 7 times)
I barely made it to the vet before the vomit started again, along with the next thing in this adventure, diarrhea!
For those of you worried about the dog, he survived and was back to eating compost within a week.
For those of you worried about me, I'm now officially a cat person.
